Blissful Life

Author: akshay

  • Understanding the 1/5 Unconstitutionality of Aadhaar and What You Can Do About It Today

    What is the difference between a monarchy and a democracy?

    I am Tipu Sultan. I rule the kingdom of Mysore. I ensure that my kingdom flourishes. In order to ensure that, I will make certain rules. I will punish those who do not follow the rules. Welcome to Mysore.

    We are the people of India. We will decide what happens in India. We will elect representatives among us to make rules for India. We will keep changing these representatives. We will ensure there is social, economic, and political justice; that there is freedom of thought, expression, belief, faith, and worship; that there is equality of status and opportunity among us; and we will promote among ourselves fraternity assuring the dignity of each of us and the unity and integrity of India.

    Which of these places would you want to be born in? Mysore or India?

    I was born in India. I was not born when India was in hundreds of pieces and ruled by different kings. Neither was I born when India was under the British emperor. I was born after Indians came together, said “enough is enough” and claimed India for themselves, and having drafted for themselves the Constitution of India, decided to live by it as a democracy where justice, liberty, equality, and fraternity will prevail. Thank goodness I was born in a democracy.

    Here is a picture of the constituent assembly. Whatever they discussed while drafting the constitution is available on the Loksabha website. Reading through the constituent assembly debates is in my bucket list as well. 

    Anything more than incremental change is hard. Except during revolution. During revolution, change is the norm. India’s independence from Britain was a revolution. Because of our experience with monarchy, we chose democracy as our governing moedel. A strong constitution is fundamental to the survival of a democracy. We drafted a strong constitution taking inspiration from various strong democracies. We set that in stone. We set our democracy in stone.

    The beautiful thing about principles is that well-thought principles rarely need to change. For example, Mahatma Gandhi made truth and non-violence his principles. He could live his entire life on those principles. It is principles that give rise to many of the organizations we see around us. When the principle dies down, the organization too. The way we operate, the rules we follow, the things we do, everything can change. But the principles won’t. Indian constitution defines the principles of our nation. Whatever happens in our country should be in line with the principles laid down in our constitution.

    Think about it for a second. The constitution is the foundation of our democracy. If we do not uphold the constitution, we are destroying our democracy, we are giving up on all the principles that the constitution stands for. Hold that thought.

    The constitution alone is not sufficient to run a country. Which is why the constitution allows for setting up of legislative, judiciary, and executive branches for the democratic government. Legislative to write laws. Judiciary to read laws. Executive to execute laws. (Like Unix file permissions). And there is clear power separation between the branches on who can do what.

    The distinction between branches work well when everyone is doing just what they are supposed to. Law gets passed by legislature that from October 1 people should ride their vehicles on the right side of the road. Police fine or even arrest people who are riding on the left side on Gandhi Jayanthi. They are produced before the court and the court gives them the punishment prescribed in the act.

    Things get murky when the constitution is involved or invoked, though. Vrinda Werkijal who was arrested on October 2nd, goes to the court and says “It is my constitutional right to ride on the road as I please. Rather than punishing me, you should strike down the law that says I can’t ride on the left side.” Then the court would be happy to point out to Werkijal that there is no constitutional right to ride on any side of the road and put Werkijal in jail.

    But, imagine the law was about free speech. Say UP passes a law tomorrow that says people should not use the word “beef” in the state. Abhish Mathew could go to the court even before he gets arrested and argue that the law is against the fundamental right of freedom of speech and therefore should be struck down. Easy peasy.

    Wish everything was so black and white. Many laws are huge. Huge in terms of the components in it. Take Aadhaar Act itself. It has 59 clauses spread over 8 chapters. And many of these are complicated compounded sentences with multiple sub-clauses. When an unconstitutionality claim on such a thing is claimed, it will indeed take months of litigation and thousands of human hours to decide on constitutionality.

    In short, there is only one argument against aadhaar: it ensures surveillance while claiming to ensure welfare and does not even ensure welfare.

    Let us imagine. What does it take to decide on this case? Even for a person who is not influenced by politics and not corrupt, it takes deep and philosophical understanding of:

    • the constitution
    • how surveillance damages democracy or how privacy is important in democracy
    • the disproportionate power that entities with access to big data obtain
    • the technology that is running behind aadhaar
    • the reality of welfare delivery in our country

    Unfortunately, superficial understanding of these won’t do. Someone with superficial understanding would say things like, “hmm, aadhaar will help catch terrorists”, “hmm, we can save money by removing fake accounts in the PDS”, “hmm, you don’t have to worry about surveillance if you have nothing to hide”.

    But if you go read the critiques of aadhaar, you can hear deeper perspectives on how biometric authentication is probabilistic and how arbitrarily a threshold setting configured on a software can either declare you undeserving or deserving for your fundamental rights; on how design choices enabled illegitimate enrollment which has lead to ghosts and fakes in the database – the very thing you set out to weed out; on how democratic voices are stifled in a surveillance state; on why Rajya Sabha is indeed a part of the parliament; and so on.

    Relevant section from Supreme Court judgement on Aadhaar’s constitutionality

    So, why would someone feel like aadhaar is unconstitutional while others don’t? Why is it 1/5 unconstitutional? You know the answer, don’t you?

    If you would like to spend more time crying over spilt milk, read from page 568 onwards of this PDF file.

    What you must do now

    As a citizen of India, it is in your own best interest to ensure that the democracy continues unharmed. The best way to do so is to elect representatives wisely. That is not an everyday choice though. But you do have a choice every day to engage with the government. For example, ministry of electronics and information technology has invited feedback on a draft personal data protection bill. The bill is riddled with issues. First, read analyses of it. Here are a few links:

    Looking at loopholes in sections of the Bill pertaining to data ownership, RTI and more
    Loopholes pertaining to empowerment of children, consent and surveillance State
    India’s data protection draft ignores key next-generation rights

    Then, write to the ministry with your comments.
    Through Ministry directly
    Through Maadhyam

    Be a good citizen. Live in a strong democracy.

  • Bridges, bridges, everywhere

    I’m a Bangalorean now. I have a metro card as well. For about a week now, I have been talking to a lot of people and reading (also searching for 1BHKs around IISc). Turns out there are not many secrets in answers to “What to do in life?”

    There were a few points that made sense and helped me gain immense clarity. I’ll list them down.

    Immanuel Kant: Mark Manson’s post on him is a nice read on the kind of moral philosophy that we can have. It is slightly complicated but boils down to “strive to be the best, if not you’re doing injustice to yourself”.

    Remember it was the same idea that propped up earlier with reference to Gita.

    In fact, Priyanka Chopra lists down 12 rules in her breaking the glass ceiling talk which sounds similar as well – be fierce, fearless, and flawed.

    Stoicism: Talking about fears, Tim Ferris made a really nice TED talk on defining fears and defeating them. He gives an excellent tool to practice stoicism. And stoicism is an absolutely useful “-ism” in times of uncertainty.

    Bridges: The place where I have to go to isn’t really somewhere that people frequently go to from my place. Therefore, I have to build a few bridges to that place. The only issue is to differentiate bridges from hangouts.

    Money: There are a few important lessons about money.

    One is that money saved is indeed money earned. If you can decrease your expense, you won’t need a huge income.

    The other is that money created is a measure of value created. If you are building a product and want to know if it really adds value to the world, just count how much money has been generated by the product.

    Integrity: When we talk, we need to walk the talk. This doesn’t mean you stop talking about anything that feels important to you. It means that you should keep pushing. Talk, then write, then do, then do more, then do maximum, and then keep doing.

    Bed bugs: Bed bugs are really pesky pests. Do not try to adjust with such annoyances. Overcome them.

    Failure is not a choice. But success definitely is.

  • What Next?

    I am privileged. I was born into a higher middle class family in Kerala. I have not been discriminated against based on my family’s religion/caste/colour/whatever. I am male. My parents are both alive and work in public sector. I even had access to internet at a very early age. I was allowed and assisted to dream.

    Precious copy of my life plan (written after 10th standard)

    My father is a doctor. I became a doctor. Natural. It was not incredibly difficult. I did not have to fight unfair situations. I had plenty of help.

    I think it is because of my excellent background that I am able to even recognize these privileges.

    Consciously or not, much of my life’s philosophy is influenced by this. My obsession with free knowledge, is a good example. I may not be able to erase the advantages I already have, but I try to avoid relying on them.

    There is no point in beating myself too much either. I am not responsible for my privileges. But I am accountable. Having had all this, if I do not make the best out of them, I am wasting them. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. But what if life gives you apples?

    I have a few straightforward options.

    • Become a specialist/super-specialist doctor. Work in one or two hospital(s). Make a lot of money. Help a lot of people.
    • Go back to SVYM. Help build a resurgent India.
    • Join some other organization/hospital/research project which can benefit from a clinical doctor.

    None of these are mutually exclusive options either.

    Yesterday I was coincidentally discussing with dad a verse from Gita which has many different interpretations.

    karmaṇyēvādhikārastē mā phalēṣu kadācana.
    mā karmaphalahēturbhūrmā tē saṅgō.stvakarmaṇi৷৷2.47৷৷

    Specifically, it is the last part we concentrated on. “You should not not do your duties.” How do you know what your duties are, though?

    Every person plays multiple roles in their lives. They would have multiple roles each inside family, work, society, and any other sphere of their life. There are duties in each of these. Is there any way you can prioritize one above the other?

    I have never been good at prioritizing things in the past. I usually get distracted by the most visible task and forget rest of my duties. I sometimes am able to note them down and come back to them. But this is fixable.

    24 hours is what everyone has per day, on Earth. There are indeed people who get a lot accomplished in that 24 hours. If they can, so can I. I will have to organize my time well and get disciplined. And more importantly, I will have to choose the right commitments.

    That is what we are coming to, aren’t we? Commitments. What are the right commitments for me now? What should I do next?

    I keep reading “A Guide for Young People: What to Do With Your Life By Leo Babauta” now and then. The gist is this:

    The idea behind all of this is that you can’t know what you’re going to do with your life right now, because you don’t know who you’re going to be, what you’ll be able to do, what you’ll be passionate about, who you’ll meet, what opportunities will come up, or what the world will be like. But you do know this: if you are prepared, you can do anything you want.

    Prepare yourself by learning about your mind, becoming trustworthy, building things, overcoming procrastination, getting good at discomfort and uncertainty.

    You can put all this off and live a life of safety and boringness. Or you can start today, and see what life has to offer you.

    Lastly, what do you do when your parents and teachers pressure you to figure things out? Tell them you’re going to be an entrepreneur, start your own business, and take over the world. If you prepare for that, you’ll actually be prepared for any career.

    Is this advice for me? Am I already at that point where I should be knowing what I’ll be doing and who I am? At the end of my final MBBS, I thought the one year of internship will be the time when I finally understand what I will do with my life. But I was wrong. During FHM, I got a few ideas on the kind of life I do want to pursue. I am sure I will not be going back to a university in a few years. And then there are a few preferences.

    I sort of want to do things that create massive impact. That is why I got bored of clinical work. It was the same thing happening every day. Sick patients, some diagnosis, some treatment, some outcome. At the end of the day, not much has changed in the way things are.

    I want to do creative things as well. I do not want to be remembered for things I did. I want to be remembered when people use things I built.

    I love internet. It is a technology that has immense potential. I want to utilize it.

    I love computers. Computers (including the small ones called smartphones) are all over the world. Sooner or later they will take over the world. I definitely want to be a part of this take-over.

    I love teaching and learning. I want to help people learn all they want to. Knowledge should not become monopolized. 

    I believe I am good at a few different skills – programming, writing, clinical care, teaching. I want to do things that utilize all my skills. If I do not utilize all the skills I have, I am wasting those skills. That would be running away from “duty”.

    In fact, I have a few ideas in my mind which are aligned with all these preferences. I want to build free software (free as in freedom) that bring the power of internet and data science to healthcare. I want to enable people (especially the ones in healthcare) to achieve more through the use of technology. I want to make sure this immense power (of technology) does not get accumulated in a few hands. And I want more people like me – I want to ensure there are hundreds of thousands of people with me who do things like me (or better!).

    These can’t happen if I am alone. I need to connect with people. I need to build on collective strength. I already know a few people I would love to work with. Almost all of them are in the Silicon Valley of India. What makes perfect sense for me to do next is – move to Bangalore and start talking to people. That’s what I am going to do as well.

  • Cough Up Some Patriotism, Please!

    Many Indians have a “respect” problem. To them, respect is physical. Bowing down, touching feet, keeping legs uncrossed, standing up, using the words “sir” or “madam” in every sentence, and so on. On the other hand they also have great difficulty in respecting others’ time, personal space, or opinions.

    They are ignorant of their hypocrisy. And this is what makes them intolerant when it comes to topics like national anthem being completely out of place for movie theatres.

    To them standing for 52 seconds for national anthem is their duty towards their country. And their duty ends there. They don’t feel the need to stand up against corruption by not paying bribes. They don’t feel the need to stand up against bureaucratic inefficiency by demanding rights. They don’t feel the need to stand up and be a good citizen in a democracy.

    Kindly stand up for the flag when you are reading this part of the post.

    Because, you see, like respect, concepts like participative democracy, growth and development, efficiency, and creativity are totally alien to them. They are used to one kind of lifestyle – that of meek subservience. They make it clear that they do not like to be forced to think outside the box. They are comfortable in their zones and are not to be disturbed by provoking thoughts. Their emotions are liable to get (butt)hurt if you consider poking.

    You cannot blame them for this. They have been brought up like that. Punishments were the most used tool for teaching and while growing up. And so, everything is tied to fear. And fear manifests as slapstick respect and all the irrelevant physical things that many Indians do to “show respect”.

    Maybe some of them are literate. Maybe they understand. My sincere piece of advice to them would be to replace respect and fear with love. Love thy country. Love thy countrymen. Let love guide you into doing wonderful things for the country and humanity in toto.

    More importantly, don’t judge my patriotism by your standards. Stop slapping people for not doing things exactly like you want them doing. There are multiple ways to be a good citizen. Forcing people into doing things to prove themselves will only do harm. Sitting or standing, national anthem is just a symbol. If you really respect your country, show some real respect for the democracy.

    Related read: The National Anthem and the Supreme Court’s Popcorn Nationalism

  • My Obsession with Free Knowledge

    I have a peculiar attachment with free knowledge – the concept that knowledge should be free of conditions and unencumbered by geographical, economic, cultural, and any other avoidable barriers. This often puts me in a position where I strangely reject certain well meant advices simultaneously appearing stupid and arrogant to others.

    For example, a good friend and fellow citizen once suggested to me that I join Landmark Forum, a 3 day course that helps people understand their hidden biases and become more productive people. I listened to their forum leader speaking about how the course works and the psychology behind it and I was sure it would be a fantastic idea. But, when it came to registering for the course and participate, something prevented me from doing it.

    The other day I asked a pharmacologist friend if she knew any prophylactic treatment for syphilis. She went to UpToDate (or I’m not sure if it was some other similar service) and started looking up the information. I was curious what she was using and whether I could have it in my phone too. She said it would need a subscription, but she was willing to share her username and password with me. I said that I didn’t want access to it.

    Yesterday a close friend suggested Dr Thameem Saif’s lecture series on basic concepts in medicine for me. She said that it was really good and helps to grasp basic concepts really fast, saving a lot of time. I agreed with her on all that and said I wouldn’t attend the lecture series.

    Additionally, I hate the concepts of entrance coaching, tuition, etc.

    The pattern I see emerging is that I have constant disregard for knowledge that is held behind restrictions, especially if tied with a business. I don’t consider making a business out of knowledge evil. But I hold a pet peeve against using that kind of knowledge for my personal benefit.

    To understand this attitude, you need to look at the other things that I value and principles that I care for.

    Free software

    Free as in free speech, not free coffee. Here is an interesting paragraph from gnu.org about free software:

    The idea of the Free Software Movement is that computer users deserve the freedom to form a
    community    . You should have the freedom to help yourself, by
    changing the source code to do whatever you need to do. And the
    freedom to help your neighbor, by redistributing copies of programs to
    other people. Also the freedom to help build your community, by
    publishing improved versions so that other people can use them.

    I have been an ardent user and advocate of free software for the past 8 or so years. The idea that there is collective ownership of software and people being able to make and share improvements on the software with each other thus creating a better product for everyone is addictive. So much that once you subscribe to this philosophy you feel grudge and guilt if you were to use or be forced to use non-free software for any task.

    I can still use Microsoft Word on my parents’ computer running Microsoft Windows to type a letter. But it simply won’t feel right.

    Open Web

    The Open Web is that part of the world wide web which is open for anyone to use, create, and innovate in irrespective of their location, race, gender, economic status, etc. according to me.

    Internet has enabled human dreams far quicker than any other invention. Internet is a great equalizing force. Internet has elevated human life to a higher level. And Open Web is the most important pillar of this success.

    With the Open Web, it is far more easy and quick for people anywhere on earth to share and receive knowledge. Collaboration is cakewalk. Building upon each other’s ideas becomes rule rather than exception. Charles Darwin and Gregor Mendel worked on two critical pieces of the theory of evolution at around the same time. But they never knew about each other’s work. Won’t ever happen in the internet age.

    When I see internet services that are “app-only” or requires sign in for viewing, I wince. They are justified in trying to retain users. But it simply won’t feel right for me to use such a service.

    Open Access

    With internet, the cost of publishing came to almost zero. And so one would think that science literature would become cheaper and cheaper to access. But the opposite is the truth. Scholars expend their lives trying to expand the horizons of science and publishing industry locks down their contributions to select few who are willing to pay exorbitant amounts of money to access this.

    People who fight these are killed. But their spirit cannot be killed. Open Access movement is gaining large amount of followers. When enough academicians hold fast to the promise that they won’t publish in money-thirsty journals, there will be a tilt in the way scientific literature is published.

    Science needs to be set free. And open access to scientific articles is crucial here.

    I’ve not published anything yet. But when I do, it will be open access. And I keep asking the people I have any influence over, to keep their contributions to the knowledge base that humans have built to be open access.

    Free Knowledge

    It is in this backdrop that free knowledge enters.

    Organizations like Wikimedia, Creative Commons, and even YouTube have done a lot to advance free knowledge. “Imagine a world in which every single person on the planet is given free access to the sum of all human knowledge.”

    If you have been reading carefully till now, you know that free culture is my culture. And free knowledge is an inalienable part of free culture.

    From as early as 11th standard, I have been using the internet and all the wonderful resources in it to learn. I fell in love with MIT’s OpenCourseWare. When NCERT textbooks weren’t enough I would run to OERs like CK-12.

    But when I joined MBBS I faced the greatest challenge ever. To date I have not been able to find any good collaborative (or not) open textbook online for medicine or any subject that medical education includes. There have been very good attempts like Ophtho book, Path Bites, Radiopaedia.org, etc. But the information is usually so scattered that it is very difficult to get a comprehensive understanding of the subjects.

    In this scenario, I was forced to resort to traditional textbooks. I made it a point not to purchase expensive textbooks. I’ve scraped all the corners of the internet to find out useful PDF files.

    And at the same time I made a pledge to myself that I will leave the condition a bit better by organizing the information that I find and making it possible for a future student to click on links and get access to various information as required. That is why learnlearn.in was born.

    Now that I have finished MBBS I no longer am under duress to stick to textbooks to avoid prolonged stay at a not-so-nice place. But, in the spirit of pirate philosophy, I continue to access resources that are required even when they’re not free knowledge. But I have set a personal restriction that I will not be using resources that aren’t obtainable from the internet.

    By doing this I am expecting to create a path which can be followed by others. I want success, but I want only reproducible success. I don’t want to be successful because I had access to a particular resource by virtue of my geographical, economic, cultural, or any other privileged position.

    So what about things I learn at VMH? Well, my plan here is to put everything that I learn here online. Also, a point to note is that at VMH there’s no package of knowledge that is sold. It’s all experiential learning that occurs here. And people are welcome to work and learn from here.

    Can’t you do the same with Forum, UpToDate, and Dr Thameem? Well, not impossible. But, like I said earlier about using Windows as a free software advocate, it just doesn’t feel right.

    But more importantly, by striving to learn exclusively from free knowledge resources, I create a demand for free knowledge thereby encouraging creators to produce more content in free domain and also allowing people who come after me to have a road that’s been taken before them.

    Let’s build a society where knowledge is free.

  • Why I Write

    Subtracting the dates, I have been blogging for more than 9 years as of now. That is not a big number considering how blogging was mainstream years before I began. Neither have I written a lot by quantity.

    But I have been writing. I do not remember if I had any specific idea in mind on what to write about when I began. I was pretty new to the internet when I began. And I thought everyone who used internet maintained a blog for their personal ruminations.

    I always had things to write about. Be it my take on things happening in the world, be it something new that I learned that day, be it a travelogue, be it a simple new thought. There has been times I was so engrossed in life outside that I have forgotten to write. Or times when I was too tired that I could not write. But never have I not written because I didn’t have anything to write about.

    For a long time, I did not care about the audience. My writings were mostly for myself and addressed at random strangers on the internet. I did not worry about who would be or would not be reading my posts. I was never concerned about the relevance of my posts. Because it was always relevant to me.
    Not much has changed. I now regularly post updates from me on Telegram and WhatsApp (check the sidebar on details how to join) but I am not worried about people not reading what I write. Because even today, I write for myself.

    I consider blogging to be documentation of one’s mind. In addition, I think writing helps clarify ideas for oneself. That clarity of mind is very important for me.

    A simple image I drew in Krita because without illustrations, people tend to get bored with long blog posts.

    I have been inspired by others writing. My favourite blogs had been zen habits, Scott H. Young, Study Hacks, BetterExplained, LifeHacker, Dumb Little Man, PluginID, etc. After my dad and My Experiments With Truth, I think these blogs have exerted the most influence on shaping what I am today.

    Unlike books, a blog keeps coming back at you. You read a book, you are deeply affected by it, and sometimes it stays with you throughout your life. But you start following a blog, the author keeps coming back to you with their ideas and influences forever (till you stop following). For those who read, what they read shapes them.

    And I read. I have read on the internet much more than I have read books. This could be bad. Because to write a book needs much more deliberation and therefore books by definition have more concrete ideas. But that is also a good point for blogs. Blogs are direct unfiltered thoughts from a person’s mind. They do not go through the censorship of acceptability or merchantability.

    And therefore multitudes of raw, sometimes radical, nevertheless vibrant and different ideas have entered my mind and some have stayed back.

    It is in the same spirit that I write. What use is a thought if it has not been shared? I may be redundant and be writing what others have already written about. But the collection of thoughts that I represent in my writings is unique.

    That’s the truth. I write to influence. Thoughts that aren’t expressed simply do not exist. If you care for something, you need to show that you care. And writing is my way of doing it.

  • Rekindling Ambitions

    On the eve of independence day in 2013, I wrote this post
    which was about keeping ourselves safe from getting involved
    in situations where doing good might be bad. I grew more and more
    pessimistic about life and people around me since then. Going through
    the comments section of any news item would put me in a state of teeth
    clenching aversion towards fellow country men.

    I was not like this. I was patriotic. I called myself ASD of India. I believed in people like Dr APJ Abdul Kalam when they said that it’s possible to do anything if we have a desire strong enough. Swami Vivekananda’s words “Arise, awake, and stop not till the goal is reached!” would make me determined to succeed.

    My schools were the best. They never taught me the meaning of impossible. Everything seemed possible. Everything seemed interesting. Everyone was involved with the same spirit.

    But college was something entirely different. Suddenly, I was exposed to the bad, and sad sides of humanity. Not just in the immediate surrounding. Newspapers suddenly became sources of bad news. In fact, I quit reading newspapers entirely. They were becoming too negative for me. Or was it that I was too weak to face the reality? Maybe. But I could imagine alternate realities (or fantasies) in which people are far less corrupt and far more content. I could imagine spirited colleagues. I could imagine living in a better society.

    For some reason, I assumed that those were just fantasies. I grew too pessimistic. I assumed that honesty will never win and that as time goes on, things will get only worse. I figured that we were doomed. I knew that there was no future for humanity.

    This negativity has contributed more than a little to my decision not to run behind a post graduate seat. I had already grown sick of the education system much before I grew sick of the entire system. I was not going to spend any more time in that toxic environment that’s called “college”. Any college.

    I was clueless on what to do when I joined Vivekananda Memorial Hospital. It took me more than a month, but now I’m finally beginning to understand.

    Yesterday, there was an orientation session here. VMH is run by Swami Vivekananda Youth Movement. The CEO of SVYM, Dr MA Balasubramanya gave a speech in the orientation session. He ran through the history of the organization. The values of SVYM is “Satya, Ahimsa, Seva, and Tyaga”. SVYM does an incredible amount of good work in Karnataka. And it started from two batches of students of MMC. It has taken 32 years for this organization to become what it is right now. And it hasn’t paid a single rupee in bribe to reach where it is.

    The most important thing that he spoke yesterday and that hit me hard was that it was indeed possible for honest people to survive. That it was indeed possible to do good things. That good people do, in fact, exist.

    I have a theory of love. When you fall in love with a person the first time, there is a component of infatuation. Once you grow beyond that, you start to see imperfections in your partner and stop loving them as much. But there is a certain moment in the relationship where you fall in love with the same person again. The difference is that this time, you know all the positives and negatives of your partner and you are loving the whole person. This newfound love is unbreakable. Because you have accepted all the bads of your partner, there is nothing new that can change your love.

    I think I should now apply the same theory to ambitions. Initially we go through the rosy feeling of the entire world being full of possibilities and unlimited potentials. Then there is a rough patch in which you grow tired and weary, and forced to give up. It was only when I had given up and threw my hands in despair that I got help.

    If I had ever been able to believe in mythical spirituality, I’d have called it Swami Vivekananda’s infinite power. Otherwise, what can explain the coincidence of my first love of the world be propelled by Swami Vivekananda’s books and now, my rekindled love of the world be propelled by an organization that lives by his name and values?

    Positive thoughts come to you when you are surrounded by positive people. Fortunately, I’ve come to such a place. Now is the time to ride the wave. Expect more.

  • Why would Kashmir want to stay with India when they don’t even get access to internet like the rest of Indians?

    India is brutally restricting access to internet in Kashmir. And like marital rape, suppressing a citizen’s basic rights this way is legal in India.

    There are complex geopolitical issues in Kashmir. But, what wrong did internet in Kashmir do to be treated like trade with an enemy state?

    There is a class of Indians who conflates the cloud with clouds in the sky and internet with Pandora’s box. They know internet only as a replacement for their porn CDs and a medium for terrorists to coordinate their strikes. It is probably the same people who banned internet in Kashmir and keep it that way.

    Internet is a wormhole in your basement which lets you explore and experience places and cultures that you can never otherwise in your life. Internet is full of opportunities that are limited only by one’s imagination. Internet gives answers that you can find nowhere else. Internet can teach you anything from cooking to neuroscience.

    Internet is a great equalizer. It empowers the disempowered. It does not care whether you are rich or urban middle class, Muslim or atheist, gay or bi, left-winged or religious fanatic, above 18 or just lying to be; you are what you say you are. And when Twitter is down, it is down for everyone.

    Also, internet is so huge and powerful that knowing how to wield it is a skill (called “web literacy”) in itself. There are problem areas inside internet that one needs to be aware and careful of. One needs to learn a great deal while using internet to be using it effectively. Internet is not for the ones who give up easily.

    Perhaps, India has a huge bunch of web illiterates. Perhaps, that is why they think blocking internet in Kashmir can be of any good. For, little do they realize the value of the greatest innovation of mankind (after the wheel, of course) that they so comfortably withhold from Kashmir.

  • Haridwar

    This notorious place. Do anything you want, but never eat a thing from
    here. They are probably taking all their water from the E-coli filled
    dirty sacred holy river Ganga. We had no plan to eat at the bank of the
    river, but it rained and we got trapped near a place and we ate some and
    the story turns worse.
    But before that, we had some nice
    time walking by the side of the river. We had reached the Haridwar
    railway station by afternoon. And the Russian would leave for Delhi in
    the 18:15 Shatabdi Express. He was particular that he goes in an air
    conditioned train because of what had happened on our journey from Delhi
    to Dehradun. All of us had something to cover ourselves with, except
    him. We were in sleeper compartment. He went to his berth like a Russian
    and we assumed Russians were resistant to cold. Turns out they aren’t.
    They just have excellent warming systems in their place. So, the outside
    temperatures might go below zero, but inside the homes are warm. And in
    the morning all of us had woken up from a good night’s sleep except
    him. So he couldn’t miss this AC train to Delhi.

    But we
    still had some time to pass before the train would arrive. There were
    so many police officers deployed in the railway station. Turns out it
    was indeed a special occasion and we would have cursed ourselves if we
    had reached there a day later. It was going to be an ‘ardh kumbh mela’
    next day. Means a lot of devotees running to the river. Anyhow, we
    walked perpendicularly towards the river.

    The banks
    were surprisingly calm. There were a few devotee groups sitting here and
    there. People dressed like Lord Shiva kept walking by us. The river was
    mighty, filled to the brim. We walked more than a kilometer like that
    and took enough photos on the way. After all, the river is a river.

    Panorama

    We
    were walking towards a huge Shiva statue. But it was too far for us to
    walk to and it appeared to be on an island all by itself. Instead we
    decided to go to this part of the river where they would float lamps on.
    We were there, but it wasn’t time yet for the devotees to come in
    masses with the lamps. So we decided to check out the shops on the
    parallel road. This is where it rained and we got charmed into eating
    thalis and kesari from a dhaba.

    When the rain
    subsided, it was time for the Russian to leave. We dropped him back at
    the station waving him goodbye. On the way to the station we had nice
    warm tea at another shop too. And then we came back to the place where
    the lamps would float.

    The lamps had started floating.
    There was a small mandir on the bank where people would fetch these
    from. There also was a monkey on its roof trying to steal the bananas
    offered to the God there being rattled away by the priest. Then there
    was this set of people standing in the river with water up till their
    knees. They would use a piece of glass (or transparent plastic?) to look
    through the surface of the river on to the bottom and pick something
    from the bottom using their long magnetic stick. Turns out, coins. Look,
    pick, transfer. Repeat.

    We observed them and the floating
    lamps for a while and then walked around the city. There was a Chinese corner where we had noodles and soup. Night had fallen and that would be our dinner. We then walked to the riverbank again. There were cold seats to sit on. We sat with the breeze hitting us hard and the mighty river tempting me to jump into and die.

    After a while, we went back to the railway station. They had a
    waiting room upstairs. Filled with people though. We spread a newspaper
    and sat outside. Our train was coming only after midnight. I slowly drifted into sleep.

  • Mussoorie

    We reached Mussoorie around 4 o’clock. Although we saw the youth hostel
    on the way we weren’t sure if they provided accommodation and it was a
    bit far from all the places we wanted to trek to. At the bus stand an
    agent approached us asking if we wanted rooms and then led us to a
    nearby hotel where we got a large room where the 4 of us could stay. The
    Russian asked if a room warmer was available. It was, at ₹200 extra. We
    went for it and that decision was a lifesaver as you will soon come to
    know.

    By then the Sun was going to go down and we didn’t
    want to waste that day by not going anywhere. I calculated the distance
    to various places we could go to and settled on going to Everest house.
    The distance could be covered on foot in about an hour said Google Maps.
    But that hour easily stretched into two. I’ll write about how
    GPS-enabled/dependent our treks were in a later post.

    We
    did get lost once and reached a high-security hotel with dogs that
    would look like they could rip you apart. But we retraced, walked, and
    stomped our way forward. At about 800m to Sir George Everest House you
    reach this cafe called Seagreen. It was really dark by then and so we
    decided to go to the Everest House first and then go to the cafe on
    return even though we were really hungry and hadn’t had any food (I had
    promised my travel mates that there were so many restaurants on the way
    where we could eat from, but turns out the map is different from
    reality). Here, two dogs joined us on the upward climb.

    The
    climb is steep but there is a clear unpaved path upwards and although
    it was dark we had enough moonlight to see our way. The dogs – we named
    them Schwanan (Malayalam for dog) and Hillary. We were so late that the
    tiny shops on the sides which would sell soft drinks and noodles were
    closing down one by one. It was still wonderful how there were people
    running such shops everywhere. Schwanan was leading the way at times and
    at other times slowing down to catch up with Hillary who was trailing.
    But I realized that day that these were probably the descendants of
    those very same dogs which gave Sir George Everest company when he
    climbed that hill to set up his house on top.

    And then
    we reached the house, quite literally at the top of the hill and at the
    edge of the land. But to call it a house would be a mistake because all
    that remained were a few walls which have now been written over with
    names of couples inside huge ❤ symbols.

    And then there
    was a surprise. There was light! There were the Himalayan mountains far
    away glistening in red, orange, and all the colours of the setting Sun.
    The horizon was a rainbow between the starlit dark sky and the snowy
    white mountains. We were the only people there, the last trekkers of the
    day. The 4 of us and Schwanan. Hillary had gone away somewhere else.

    We
    spent only about 15 minutes on the top because we were hungry, it was
    getting cold, it was getting darker, and we had taken enough panoramas
    and selfies and timer shots. On the way back, we had to intermittently
    shine a fridge market torch one of us had to make sure there were no
    snakes or holes. And we did stop here and there to look at the stars and
    make out random constellations that didn’t even exist.

    As
    we had decided we took a break at Seagreen Cafe where we had a large
    pizza and hot coffee. More importantly they had a room warmer which
    worked on coal maybe and we took a lot of warmth from it. Working on his
    tablet was a fellow traveller who was spending some time in North India
    before flying to Scotland to meet his girlfriend. We waved him goodbye
    and walked back, trying and failing to hitchhike. On the long way back
    which felt shorter, the 3 of us who were Malayalis sang some of our boat
    racing songs to keep us going faster. When we got tired, the Russian
    taught us his marching songs too. We reached our rooms and slept
    peacefully with the warmer first on, and then off.

    This is where warmth comes from

    For
    next day, I had decided that we would trek to a “Tibetan Buddhist
    Temple” which looked good in photos on Google Maps. We woke up early,
    had breakfast and started walking. We weren’t even a kilometer down when
    it started to drizzle slightly. We walked on till the rain got heavier
    and we had to find shelter in a building on the roadside. As we stood
    there we tried to find a hike to the temple but unfortunately it was too
    early in the morning and there were no vehicles going that side. The
    rain gave in slightly and we continued to walk. checking off landmarks
    to make sure we were on the right path. But then, all of a sudden there
    was heavy downpour and our woollen clothes were absorbing all the water
    like a camel at an oasis. We tried taking cover again, but by then we
    were so wet and so close to the temple on the map that we decided to
    brave the rain.

    There was ice on the road. It was a
    hailstorm. There was water everywhere. Our shoes were wet despite our
    best attempts to not step on water. And the hail was hitting us hard
    too. Anyhow we reached the Buddhist temple. Like the rain wasn’t enough,
    the temple was closed that morning. We could not go inside, but we
    could take photos from outside and see the valley. As I was trying to
    take a picture of the temple, I realized to my horror that my fingers
    were getting so cold that I could not bend them to click. It was the
    case with everyone. We were going to die probably while still searching
    for an open cafe to buy some warmth.

    This was everywhere!

    But there was a
    saviour. The language teacher of a Tibetan school there was going to
    Chandigarh in his car. And after removing all the hailstones from his
    car’s windshield he was willing to drop us back to the city. We jumped
    in and he turned the AC on to full heat, dropped us near our hotel, and
    we ran to our rooms after thanking him and wishing him a happy journey.
    When we reached room we were drenched and shivering. The only warm thing
    in the room was the warmer and we sat around it warming our clothes and
    body in turns. The wet socks were fuming. Shoes definitely had to be
    dried. The room service brought cups of tea and we had bought some
    bananas on the way. After about an hour we were dry enough to pack up
    and leave.

    We had brunch at a nice warm restaurant just
    above the bus stand. It was still raining. The Mussoorie Library were
    Ruskin Bond is known to frequent was right next to us but we were in no
    mood for reading. The buses to Dehradun are the same buses that come
    from Dehradun. We waited for about half an hour and got our seats back
    to Dehradun.

    As soon as we reached the bus stand I
    realized there was a train about to leave from the station – the
    Dehradun Allahabad Link Express. We ran to the station and made sure the
    train hadn’t left and then ran to the ticket counter which is outside
    the platform and took tickets and ran back to the train and got in to
    the general compartment and the train started, all within a span of ten
    minutes. The compartment was full and the Russian got the taste of
    general compartment journey and we alighted at Haridwar.