Category: life

This thought descends directly from the old saying “Think before you talk”.

My little brother once threw a key towards me. He threw it a bit steep and I could not catch it. I immediately felt like telling him ‘You should have thrown it flat, so that it will cross me no matter how slow you throw’.
But I thought for a moment. Another day had he thrown it flat, the key would have hurried past me, and I would then tell him ‘You should have thrown it steep, so that I will get the time to align with the flying key’

And so I did not tell him anything.

I realized that when I form ‘wisdom’ from instant experience, that instant wisdom goes useless more often that not.

If you are older than someone else you live with, you must have had this moment in your life when they did some mistake and suddenly you jumped on them and told them that they did something extremely foolish, something which must have been avoided.

But from now on, when you think someone just made a silly mistake; instead of reacting quickly with an instant wisdom “You must have done the opposite”; just think whether that mistake is a real mistake at all. Whether it could have been really avoided. Whether you are just giving out instant ‘wisdom’.

And in case it was really foolish, tell them what could have been avoided.
In case it wasn’t, just smile, and move on.

Remember, think before you advise.

The analogy is that our body is the hardware, and our mind or soul is the operating system.
When you are exercising you are upgrading your hardware.
When you are learning a new language you are installing a new software.

But mind you, you are stuck with the same old operating system.
You might be tweaking your soul with a lot of new software, but basically you are just that same old operating system with a lot of vulnerabilities, missing dlls, and accumulated junk files.
You learn a lot of new things in life. You learn how to make friends, how to spring back from mistakes, failures, how to be infinitely happy and so on. But very soon you revert back to your old ways, you uninstall those software.

When you try to ADD a quality to your life, you display that quality for some days, and then you become the same old person. Because YOU are that old person, YOU have not changed. Deep inside, you are thinking that you must go back, you must be you again.

So, instead of adding new qualities, just change that basic YOU. Upgrade your operating system completely. Just redefine YOU. Let the quality be an integral component of you (a system service that cannot be uninstalled). And thus even if you become YOU again, you do not lose that new quality.

With every new thing you learn, you must redefine who you are.

Scenario 1:
Once you were not going well with others. “I do not go well with others”
And then one day you just decide you will start behaving well with people that day onwards. “I usually do not go well with others, but I will try to do well”
And the next day you get angry with someone. “I knew I am an insensitive idiot who just cannot get on well with others”
RESULT: Back to square one.

Scenario 2:
Once you were not going well with others. “I do not go well with others”
And then one day you decide that you are someone who goes well with others. “Who told you I am bad, I do go well with others”
And the next day you get angry with someone. “Well, I go well with others, but today is just not a good day”
RESULT: Just a momentary glitch, nothing to worry.


So, when you find some 2-3 new qualities that you could have in life, just bundle them together, and release them into your soul as a new OS update. Just be a new person, with those qualities inherent. Be a new you.

And those qualities will never leave you.

All those companies out there, they are brands. Google, Pepsi, Reliance, Nokia, Vodafone, Adidas, LG, Samsung, Hyundai…
Think of any one of them, without their name.

Think of Adidas selling their sports wears without their logo on it. How about a new Google service which does not begin with “Google”? Every one of those companies, and the others out there, have a brand.

This branding does not come on its own. They need to advertise, they need to put logos on their products, they need to put in their product as theirs. And after all of this they grow as a reliable brand with customers worldwide.

Not just that, when we hear of a brand name, all the values, all the ideas, all the causes that brand supports suddenly pops up into our mind. So, when we hear Google we will know it is about simplicity. Firefox – open source. LG – Making life good. Pepsi – Selling more (dil mange more :D).

Now how do we apply that to human beings?

Let us say a person X has a lot of qualities. X finishes the task assigned well in time, X meets all dead lines, X is punctual, X never wastes time, X loves working late.

Now, if you were asked to give an urgent task, one that will become messy if postponed, would you not consider X automatically?

Because you know X knows to manage time.
Then we say X is a brand in a person. A brand which puts time up in their priority list.

For becoming a brand you need to have a set of values, which you strictly adhere to.
Could be Gandhian values (like me), Buddhist values, Islamic values, or for that matter the values of any religion, English values, American values, European values, Indian values.
Or it could be hybrids.
Or it could be a new set of values that you define on your own.

But whatever be your values, you need to strictly adhere to it.
If you say “you will always be happy”, you must always be smiling.
If you say “impossible is not a word in my dictionary”, you must display that courage to do anything.
If you say “I love sleeping”, you must have even tried polyphasic sleep.

The idea is you must be predictable. If you say “I will be unpredictable”, you must be always (and predictably) unpredictable.

And then people will know what to expect from you and what not to.
That way when there is some thing that you can do well, they will know who can do it well.
When an expert is needed in what you love to do, they will know whom to run to.
And you will not have to explain the reason behind things you are doing. Because they know that it is your nature to do such things. You will no longer be misunderstood, because they know what you are meaning.
Life becomes so much more easier.

So, brand yourself.

Sometimes messing up life can be more delighting than going through the routine systematically.
How?
When you do something systematically:

• You do it
• You go home

You talk with people, but you are not emotionally associating with people.

When you mess up:

• You try to do something
• You mess up
• You try your best to make amends for the mess you made
• In that process you talk with a lot of people (or may be just one) most often through your heart

Finally you end up emotionally a lot more closer with those people than you would have in the first case.

Emotional intimacy converts into friendship or at least a deep sense of attachment.
That is increased number of people ready to provide warmth to you.
And in the end how happy you are depends a lot on how warm they keep you.

So, if you do something as you should have; OK, go home, sleep well, be happy!

But if you mess up?
Make amends.
Try all out to make amends.
Do not leave anyone unhappy.
Do not allow anyone to sleep that night with a grudge on you.

Then go home. Sleep well.
Next morning you will wake up a lot more happier.

When you have no problem in life you will be happy; but when you have problems and you solve them, you end up happier.

Mess up life.

Today evening I was thinking:  ‘Life is pointless, where am I leading to, what should I do next‘
I was feeling enervated.
I knew I was not in a good mood at all.
I tried finding some motivational quotes in the world wide web. But all those awesome quotes suddenly felt like mere words for me.
Windows media player was playing only the sad songs.
Everything in the TV seemed to be worse than boring lectures
I thought about reading some book, but I did not have the energy to stand up and walk to the book shelf.
Everything let me down.
I thought I would find some solace in my gmail inbox. I found a lone mail there from a friend. She had already forwarded it to everybody I knew. And archiving the mail showed me that familiar “No new mail!” slogan.
I was depressed. I was angry at myself for being so. But I was unable to get out of the mood.

And then it happened. I just walked out of my house. I was amidst all those plants and trees. They had this exceptional aura of calmness surrounding them. And the wind which filled my lungs to its maximum. Sure it was not one of the most colourful moments of my life, but no amount of colour would be able to make me happy in that mood too. But the serene nature suddenly turned me into that productive, creative, willing-to-go-for-it me. As though the energy flowed directly from the tress into me through the wind.

And then I knew it.

All those high tech gadgets, they are sure fun. But only when you are in the mood for fun.
When you are depressed, down, what you need is some soothing.

And there is only one thing that is instantly available for everyone which can provide that solace: mother nature.

Take a stroll through the garden. Smell the leaves. Breathe the wind. Get in harmony with nature.
And then you will once again feel it. The blood rushing in your body. Your brain resuming from its slumber. Sparks of creativity in your mind.
And, you are back.

Our eyes were meant to see curves, the branching trees and arching grass and the rabbit and the river. But what we see is rectangular blocks of text in a rectangular screen or sheet on a rectangular table inside in a rectangular room. See some curves.

We are living. But what we live with are machines, inanimate and emotionless. Multimedia can fool the eyes, the ears. Junk food can fool the tongue. Ceramic tiles can fool the skin. Perfumes can fool the nose. But there is something inside everyone that senses life. And you cannot fool it for long. You’ve got to be near some life. Or soon the one inside you will die down.

Whenever you feel depressed, breathe some fresh air in the garden.

The creative mind is like a desert.
When you want something desperately it will show you mirages and endless sea of sand.
But when you are wandering aimlessly, hoping for nothing, lo! it’s an oasis before you.

When people get ideas they get too many in a row. And within minutes they forget all but one on which they focus. Thus a huge part of their creativity is lost.

How do you block the leak?

Simple.

When you get ideas, write them down.

When you get more ideas, write them down.

And after all your ideas are poured out, start developing from the beginning.

Your creativity – saved.

Always keep a pen and paper near you, who knows when you will get your next idea.
(And what do you do when you are a blogger and has just uncovered a topic about which you could make 20 posts at least?)

Anger is one of our worst enemies. When you are angry you feel very very strong. And most often people break valuable things, including glass-wares, and relationships.

But with a very simple tip, anger can be converted into a very powerful productivity tool.

It’s simple.

You are angry with someone. Instead of bashing the one you are angry at, you control your emotions. And you do something productive.

Done. You were so concentrated at the cause of anger that the whole concentration was transferred to what you did instead. And so you did it better than how you would have done normally. And by the time you finished doing it, you are no more angry.

For example, this post was written and published in about 10 minutes in which I was really angry. And I’m really happy right now, because I suddenly got almost 3 weeks worth of content to write on.

So, the next time you feel angry, instead of blowing your top, convert the heat into work.