Today I went through some of the first posts in this blog. I do not think I have changed a lot. But a lot of things have changed. Curiosity has given way to boredom. Anxieties have dissolved into indifference. And the way I look at people has become more sceptical than the optimistic it was.
Maybe it is natural to feel this, but I am feeling “toska” (as Sneha would describe it). I have discovered the meaninglessness of life. And I am still living it. I have no idea what I am living for, and I do not know whether I am happy or sad. I am sad that I am not sad. I am living mechanically.
From today, I will try to start afresh.
And I will try to keep starting afresh in the coming days. After all, that is one good thing about starting afresh, you can do it again and again.